Shared care or independent childcare?
Nanny vs mother’s help
A nanny is childcare-led and can take regular sole-charge responsibility. A mother’s help is designed around a parent or guardian who remains actively involved, with any sole-charge periods agreed clearly in the brief.
The direct answer: choose by the level of childcare responsibility, not by which title sounds lighter.
Independent childcare can be a normal part of the job.
The children and their routines are the primary responsibility. A nanny can take regular sole-charge care during the agreed working hours and may also complete child-related meals, laundry, tidying and organisation.
Shared care is the starting point.
A parent or guardian remains actively involved in daily childcare. The role can include shared childcare, child-related duties and agreed light practical support. Defined sole-charge periods can be included, but they should be stated rather than assumed.
Nanny vs mother’s help at a glance.
Use the table to define the job before discussing candidate experience, hours or pay.
| Question | Nanny | Mother’s help |
|---|---|---|
| Primary responsibility | Children, routines and child-related responsibilities. | Supporting the parent with shared childcare plus agreed practical tasks. |
| Parent involvement | The parent may be absent or unavailable for substantial periods. | The parent or guardian remains actively involved in the care arrangement. |
| Sole-charge care | Can be a regular and substantial part of the position. | Can be included in defined periods, but should not quietly become the whole working day. |
| Typical practical duties | Children’s meals, laundry, bedrooms, belongings and other agreed child-related work. | Shared childcare, child-related work and light household support where scope and frequency are agreed. |
| Best starting point | You need someone to take independent responsibility for the children while you work or are away. | You expect to remain involved and need another pair of hands during predictable parts of the day. |
Being at home is not the same as being available for shared care.
The role boundary depends on real responsibility, not simply the parent’s physical location.
Run a responsibility test across the real working week.
- Mark when the parent is genuinely available.Shared care requires more than being in the same property. Show when the parent can actually participate in childcare.
- Mark all sole-charge periods.Include work calls, appointments, commuting, exercise, school runs or any regular time when the candidate is responsible without the parent.
- Separate childcare from practical support.List children’s routines and care first, then child-related tasks and any light household work expected alongside them.
- Test the busiest day.If the role only works when everything goes to plan, the brief is too fragile. Check school holidays, illness, appointments and timetable changes.
- Name the job last.If independent childcare dominates, use a nanny brief. If the parent remains actively involved and shared care dominates, a mother’s-help brief may be the clearer description.
Which family situations point towards each role?
These are decision prompts, not rigid rules. Children’s ages, the number of children, the parent’s availability and the exact timetable can change the answer.
Useful where the parent wants shared care, another pair of hands with routines and agreed practical support while remaining actively involved.
If childcare must continue independently during the working day, define a nanny role rather than relying on a shared-care title.
A mother’s help can support a parent managing different children at once. A nanny is the clearer starting point if one adult needs to take independent responsibility for the group.
If the parent is genuinely available for shared care, mother’s help may fit. If work makes the parent functionally unavailable, the responsibility can look much more like a nanny role.
2026 London pay evidence
Is a mother’s help cheaper than a nanny?
Do not assume so from the title. Current public evidence is not like-for-like: nanny data is available as a payroll average, while mother’s-help evidence is often visible as individual vacancies with their own hours, duties and experience requirements.
Nannytax’s 2026 payroll data reports this average for an Inner London live-out nanny.
A current Hampstead mother’s-help/PA vacancy from Little Ones advertises this range for an after-school role. It is one vacancy, not a London market average.
The correct comparison is the pay required for the actual responsibility and schedule. A role described as mother’s help but requiring long sole-charge periods may attract nanny-level expectations because the work, not the label, drives the job.
From our work
The most useful mother’s-help brief states when responsibility changes hands.
On the current Filipino Domestic Services mother’s-help service page, the brief is built around three questions: when the parent is present and actively involved, when the candidate is expected to take sole-charge responsibility, and which practical tasks are included alongside childcare.
That distinction matters because two households can both ask for a “mother’s help” while offering very different jobs. In one, the parent may handle feeds and outings while the candidate helps with another child, meals, children’s laundry and tidying. In another, the parent may be at home but unavailable for long work calls, leaving the candidate responsible for the children for most of the afternoon.
We therefore treat handovers as part of the job definition rather than an informal detail to resolve after placement. The household should be able to show the shared-care periods, the sole-charge periods and the practical work expected during each block.
This also prevents the title from being used to understate responsibility. If the actual week is dominated by independent childcare, the clearer starting point is a nanny brief even if the parent happens to work from home.
If shared care is the better fit, understand Filipino mother's-help services and review a mother's help duties.
Questions about nanny and mother’s-help roles.
What is the main difference between a nanny and a mother’s help?
A nanny is childcare-led and can take regular independent responsibility for the children. A mother’s help is built around shared care with a parent or guardian who remains actively involved. Any sole-charge periods in a mother’s-help role should be defined clearly rather than assumed.
Can a mother’s help be left alone with children?
Defined sole-charge periods can be part of the role when both sides agree them. If independent childcare becomes the substantial or dominant part of the working week, a nanny brief is usually the clearer description of the responsibility.
Can a nanny do the same practical tasks as a mother’s help?
There can be overlap. A nanny may prepare children’s meals, manage child-related laundry and keep children’s areas organised. A mother’s help may do those tasks alongside shared childcare and agreed light practical support. The main distinction remains who holds childcare responsibility.
Is a mother’s help suitable if I work from home?
Possibly, but working from home does not automatically mean shared care. If meetings or focused work make you unavailable for long periods, identify those as sole-charge childcare periods. The role should reflect your actual availability rather than your location.
Is a mother’s help always cheaper than a nanny?
No. Current market sources use different evidence types and every role has its own hours, duties and experience requirements. Compare gross pay for the actual job rather than assuming a lower rate from the title alone.
What should I write down before choosing between the roles?
Record the children’s ages, normal days and hours, when the parent is genuinely available, all sole-charge periods, the core childcare duties, any child-related or light household tasks and the live-in or live-out arrangement. Then choose the title that accurately describes the responsibility.
Sources and evidence boundary.
Role boundaries and briefing observations follow the current Filipino Domestic Services service architecture. Pay figures are external market references, not FDS placement averages and not nationality-specific rates.
Choose the title after you have mapped responsibility across the week.
If you are still comparing childcare, household-management and shared-care roles, use the full household-role decision guide before finalising the brief.